
Adoption: The Making of Me: An Oral History of Adoptee Stories
On this podcast, two adult adoptees discuss all things adoption from the adoptee perspective.
Latest Episodes
S11, Ep. 7: Katherine
Katherine Allen McNally is an adoptee and a licensed therapist who specializes in working with adoptees and their adoptive families. She transitioned from a career in graphic design and advertising to pursue this path, driven by a deep personal commitment to supporting this unique population. Over the course of her work, she has encountered a wide spectrum of adoption narratives, including various forms of conception, gestation, birth, relinquishment, adoption, and survival. These experiences led her, along with a colleague, to develop a trauma healing model known as The TAG Method for Trauma Reprocessing and Integration.
At the heart of The TAG Method lies the adoption experience. Katherine is passionate about sharing this model and its insights with broader audiences. She believes that adoption represents a significant and often overlooked trauma—one that is visible yet rarely acknowledged. In her work, she explores how adoptees navigate attachment loss, the silent fear of being “not chosen” again, and the emotional impact often referred to as "the cloud." She also discusses the "three As" and how these themes influence the adoptee experience.
Katherine shares how clients access these deep-seated pains and begin the process of healing, ultimately freeing themselves from a trauma they never asked to carry. She also offers personal reflections from her own healing journey, enriching her professional insights with lived experience.
S11, Ep. 6: Theresa
Theresa Werba was born in 1962 in New York City to a 17-year-old former
prostitute. She was given up for adoption at three months old. She was placed with a loving foster mother until she was 13 months old, when she was taken away for technical reasons and placed with an older couple with ties to a New Age religious cult.
She endured a bizarre childhood of emotional and physical abuse and left home
at the age of 15. She was disinherited by both adoptive parents upon their deaths.
Theresa found her birth mother in 1984 and has had a positive relationship with
her for over 40 years. Theresa was told a certain individual was her biological father and legally assumed his last name for over 30 years. In 2020, Theresa was able to locate her biological father through DNA testing via two half-sisters. He was a completely different person from the one her mother remembered. Unfortunately, he died in 2019. He never knew that Theresa existed. Theresa legally changed her last name to his in 2020 and is exceedingly happy with her newly harmonized genetic identity.
Theresa is an author, poet, and singer. Her book, When Adoption Fails: Abuse,
Autism, and The Search for My Identity, describes the unusual and peculiar life she had growing up in an abusive adoptive home with undiagnosed autism, and the search for, and discovery of both her biological parents. Find Theresa at www.theresawerba.com and on social media @thesonnetqueen.
S11, Ep. 5: Don
Like many people who went through the foster care system, Don Anderson was really curious about his roots. He started doing some research and realized his biological aunt on his mother’s side was living less than three miles away. His wife convinced him to introduce himself. She immediately recognized him and told him he looked like his mother.
From there, Anderson met his biological mother, then started the research for his biological father. He ended up tracing his roots for generations, and now helps others trace their ancestry and find relatives. He’s written a book about his quest to find his parents.
S11, Ep. 4: Alejandra
Alejandra was adopted at five years old into a Mexican-American family. She had never sought her family of origin, but when they arrived unexpectedly, her inner strength was tested, and her spiritual growth began.
S11, Ep. 3: Jacqueline
Jacqueline, now 63 and living in Cape Town, South Africa, was born in Nairobi, Kenya, in 1962, following a relationship between her English-born biological mother, a professional actress on contract to a theatre company in Nairobi, and her Welsh and Irish biological father, a radio announcer in Nairobi. Following Jacqueline's birth, and the abandonment of her and her biological mother by her biological father, her biological mother followed him to Zimbabwe, but he refused involvement or responsibility. At Jacqueline's biological mother's father's "pleading" with her to "keep the baby", she returned to her acting career, subjecting Jacqueline to 16 months of severe abuse and neglect, which resulted in her being adopted at 16 months in Zimbabwe. While her physical needs were very well met within her adoptive family, her emotional needs were neglected, her manifest trauma being strictly discouraged, and the emotional abuse was perpetuated. Following a lifetime of fear/anxiety, specifically relationship-related, and recurring severe despair/depression, Jacqueline's belief, and message to fellow adoptees and healthcare professionals working with adoption-related and general childhood trauma, is this: sometimes the trauma is too early, too severe and too prolonged for healing to be possible, but the cycle of abuse can be broken. Jacqueline lives the proof that acceptance, compassion, and forgiveness are possible. She has broken the cycles of neglect and abuse, evident in her relationship with her daughter and son, with whom she has a relationship of deep love, mutual respect, and much joy and care.
S11, Ep. 2: Sariah
Sariah is a Chinese Adoptee adopted by a White American Mormon family and recently left the Mormon faith to find herself and to find her birth family.
S11, Ep. 1: Carol
Carol was born in Washington, DC, relinquished at birth in 1960, subsequently adopted in 1961 by a family who had adopted another daughter the year before.
She began her reunion in 2017 by finding out she was the baby sister of 3 half sisters, 2 full sisters, and her father by DNA.
S10, Ep. 12: Cameron Lee Small: The Adoptee’s Journey. Season 10 Finale
Cameron Lee Small, MS, LPCC, is a licensed clinical counselor, transracial adoptee, and mental health advocate based in Minneapolis, Minnesota. He was born in Korea and was relinquished into foster care at age three. He was then adopted in 1984 by a family in the United States. His private practice, Therapy Redeemed, specializes in the mental health needs of adoptees and their families wherever they may be in their adoption journey. His work has been featured in Christianity Today, the National Council for Adoption, and the Center for Adoption Support and Education.
S10, Ep. 11: Sandi
Sandi Morgan Caesar is a transnational adoptee. She was born Cristina Rodriguez in Panamá to a 14-year-old girl who parented her for most of her 1st year. Ultimately, she was placed for adoption by her maternal grandmother without the knowledge or consent of her first mother. Sandi was adopted by a Black US Air Force family stationed in Panamá at the time. She was naturalized as a US citizen and then brought to the US at 3 years old. It was about this time that she asked her mom why they didn't have the same face. She grew up in Dayton, Ohio, with older siblings (biological to her adoptive father). Although she thought finding family in Panamá would be impossible, Sandi reunited with her birthmother and maternal family in 2004. Sandi holds a B.S. degree in Human Development from Howard University, an M.S.W. from Indiana University, and has worked in child welfare most of her career.
S10, Ep. 10: Carol
Carol Hoeksema was born at the Salvation Army Evangeline Home for unwed mothers in Grand Rapids, Michigan, in 1957, where she stayed the first 13 days of her life before going to an unknown foster family arranged by Bethany Christian Services. At 3 months, she was given to her adoptive parents and raised in the Dutch immigrant community of Pella, Iowa. She always knew that she was adopted and was curious about her roots. At age 19, she started her search
by going to the adoption agency, and over the next 15 years, she was able to find and contact the families of both birth parents. After experiencing a secondary rejection by her mother, she found healing and belonging in doing genealogy research. In contrast, her late father’s family welcomed her with open arms. She has lived a rich life, full of family, friends, and adventures. A retired family physician, Carol lives with her husband on Camano Island, Washington. They
have 3 grown children and 4 grandchildren. In this interview, she tells the story of her adoption and search for her roots so that her descendants will know their history, too, and wants to give hope to others experiencing birth mother rejection.
